Why Gary Busey Freaks Me Out

This blog is dedicated to group of gents that I will refer to as: Mr. Americano and Associates.

ok. it is easy to see why gary busey physically freaks me the fuck out. but let me ennumerate all of the reasons.

1. his mouth is massive. it is unnatural looking. his teeth are long and yellowed.

2. he is crazy. did you see the shit that he pulled at the 2008 Oscars? people did not know what to think. watch this and you will understand the great discomfort that Mr. Busey causes people.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=xQYeL7RInsg

3. his face looks plastic and his hairline is weird. you can't even see his hairline in the photo above, but strangely you can see foppish hair which is seemingly coming from his head. that shit is suspect of plugs or a wig.

ok. i only have 3 reasons on why Gary Busey freaks me out, but they are totally legit.

Let me break it down...
It is widely believe that he is crazy because he was involved in a terrible motorcycling accident in the late 80's. Due to the fact that he was not wearing a helmet, he suffered massive skull injuries and brain damage.

i don't know dudes. he freaks me out but i can see that part of the reason why he is just overthetop nutters to me is because his face and teeth were, assumingly, rebuilt after the accident. do ya'll think that he would have been normal had he not had a horrible accident. i think that he is just riding his own brand of crazy into the sunset of the American Dream. Mr. Americano and Associates tell me that Gary Busey's reality television show entitled "I'm with Busey" is amazing.

here is a little bit of Gary Busey trivia because you never know when he might come up in conversation.

1. Was Gary Busey in the movie...
a. There Will Be Blood
b. Lethal Weapon
c. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
d. How Stella Got Her Groove Back

2. To Which Video Game Did Gary Busey lend his voice to...*
a. SmashBrothers
b. Metroid
c. Zelda
d. Vice City

*Phil Collins has a cameo in another installment of this in/famous video game. This makes him the first famous musician in the series to have a self-representive avatar. Who the fuck knew Phil Collins was chill like that. As J-Dog would say "That's what's up".
I have to admit that i have always hated his damned music, Genesis was so... chickflick vomity.

3. Has Gary Busey spawned?
a. yes
b. no

answers to this trivia qiz will be give in the next blog post.

did i mention that i am a jerk?

things i like

1. Animals. what is that my friend has on her facebook page... "loving animals is a substitute activity". anyway, i love animals. my favorite mammal is the nine-banded armadillo. my favorite animal is the great white shark. i like puppies and kittens as well as reptiles and amphibians. marine invertibrate are my jam, especially cephalpods. sea birds are the shit. i know the names of every dog that come to where i work. i will go out of my way to pet a dog.

2. The beach. i throughly enjoy the beach. it is my favorite place to be at any time of year. i would love to have a beach house one day. the best part of the beach is the shore, because it feels like the world is coming out and meeting you. for the longest time i couldn't handle the feeling of wet sand all over my body but i got over that. every july my mother and i take a week vacation and go down to the shore MD or DE. last year we had two additions: Sheba and my grandmother, who is affectionately called Tete. Sheba is a this little white puff of a dog. it was her first time at the beach, she loved it except the whole water thing. she looked like a little white sausage in the sand. god i love that dog. my grandma is pretty cool too, crazy but cool. which leads to my next thing i like...

3. my family. i love my family, even if we are all a bit nutso.

4.shoes. i love shoes. i was recently asked how many i owned and the visual number for now is about 30. but i know that is without counting my summer shoes. i feel dirty about it...sometimes. what's when i put on my heels and everything is ok.

5. i am heavy into perfume. don't get me wrong, i don't go overboard on wearing it. less is more in this case. i just believe that putting on a perfume is like putting on a mood. i have perfumes for the day and the night, they can never be worn out of context.

6. men. i like men, no i love men. as much as ya'll might think i am a huge lez, i'm not. I LOVE MEN. god sakes they can be so sexy. the angular faces, facial hair, low hips, the strength, their high little asses, broad chests and shoulders. i could go on and on and on. but dudes can be mad fucked up to chicks though, so it's a catch22.

7. sports. i like sports a lot, particularly full contact sports (hockey, lacrosse, American football). it's funny seeing that i am a 5'4" and not really atheletically inclined. i used to watch NBA ball when i was younger but became disillusioned by all the traveling and illegitmate fouls. now i don't even have a television and it's flipping the start of MarchMadness, i am dying to see some great NCAA games. GO BIG RED. the Superbowl this year had me on the edge of my seat, i was hysterical when the Giants won. but my favourite sporting event comes every four years and i live and breathe that shit. i'm talking about the World Cup. i can not freaking wait for the next one, i was glued to the set that summer. i think my love of sports is directly related to my love of men. i was told recently that i would be called a "jersey chaser". which is accurate except that i won't chase anything unless out of anger or hunger. my two top men right now are both on sports teams the Saints and the Galaxy. they are modern day adonis'.

8. other peoples babies. i am totally into babies as long as they do not come home with me or have 1/2 my DNA. my main baby for the last year or so has been Semai. just to let you all know he has four teeth and has started walking! Lincolnmonster is up there too, seeing him on Mark's shoulders and then doing his little plane thing were out of control cute.

9. cars. i have loved cars since i was little. one time my dad took my to the Javits Center to the annul car show. it was like 1994 and i was thrilled to bits. that is when i fell in love with the automotive. i could and can still kinda identify cars by the frame and headlights. a commerical for the Ford Probe sticks in my head. these little boys are having a sleepover and one is telling the other what kind of car was on the street based on the sound of the engine. then the Ford Probe comes ambling down the road and the first boys is like oh that's a Ford Probe and then the other boy is like yeah it is, but what color is it? i love that commercial, i wanted to be just like them. the Audi TDI Le Man is so sexy it hurts. but my favorite car company is Alfa Romeo, their 8C Spider is fly beyond belief.

10. jewelry. i want ice, but none of that blood diamond shit. i want canadian ice.

icydk/ riddle me this

Location: the internet in my bed and yes this is what the internet looks like from here. cool colors, huh.

I have been wondering about the internet again. there are many different languages that the internet uses. i am not sure but i think it is based in binary. fucks sake i dont know. but some of you do know this language. the internet is also built upon an internal user language as well. and i only began to notice it recently. it is kinda like text message speak, you know with all the abbreviations and acronyms that convey an action or thought. i am going to list the ones i have picked up on what urbandicitionary calls "netspeak".

SMH = shake my head
ICYDK = in case you didn't know
IMHO = in my honest opinion
NSFW = not safe for work...think nudie pics
NSFL = not safe for life, this term is even higher than nsfw. by clicking on the link death will meet you in no time, i mean, in your own time.
TL; DR = to long didn't read (this one is just sad)
HBIC = head bitch in charge hahahahahahhahhahahahahahahhah
ROFL = this one is that you have maybe used like in the days of AIMing, extension of LOL*
BB = baby
FTW = for the win, this denotes enthusiasm or excitement
TBH = to be honest
TBQH = to be quite honest

i am not sure that these ones even count because i use them in real life. those who know me know its sure. whatevs.
*LOL = laughing out loud
OMG = ohmygod, yes that is how you spell it
BFF = best friends forever
BRB = be right back. My friend Julie from back home actually taught me this one in 8th or 9th grade on AIM. i was so dense. this is how it went:

yourmomisanazol: blahblahblahblahblahblahblahblah, i'm 13 going on 45, blahblahblah
pantsrjewels: brb

waiting no reply, then suddenly....

pantsrjewels: back
yourmomisanazol: what does brb mean
pantsrjewels: be right back
yourmomisanazol: ok

then i just sat there and waited because i thought she was doing something. i didn't realize that she was telling me what brb meants. so then i was like...

yourmomisanazol: are you there? i just asked you what brb meant and you just ignored me.
pantsrjewels: no jerkface, i was telling you what brb means. it means be right back
yourmomisanazol: ooooooohh...

in the words of Oprah, it was a lightbulb moment.

my love affair with the internet began long ago, in a state 4.5 hours away. I LOVE MD and the INTERNET. word up b-more.